THIS IS ME

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This is me every time I see someone acting like a total stranger once they see me often out that I am supposed to be. I will not comment on who those people are, they know themselves very well and I think reading this post should makes it’s point and get the message out to them pretty simple. 

A little brief about me for those who don’t know me, barely knows me or have known me for years and decided to stop knowing who I am as a preference or change of interest, which is something I have started to accept hardly because I care for my people in a core level and of course it would bother me. It would bother me if I see someone gets bothered by me when I say the truth and they view it as a gossip because they are not used to truth and they like it to be fake because it looks like that’s the way how their mind sets works. It bothers me because it will put me in a situation Where I must come up with excuses or prof of evidence if I tell them that you’re best friend, colleague have behaved in a certain way towards me and their reaction was surprisingly cold in a careless tone of perceiving the story. 

It bothers me when I must defend myself in front of people who don’t seem to have their best interests or benefits from me but they definitely receiving it from the other cool person who behaved rudely towards me, and all the responses I’ve received so far, we are sorry you feeling this way. That’s strange. Move on and unfriend and block them digitally and on daily basis. 

Those gray peace makers type of people who likes to stay out of it completely, not because they are peaceful but simply I don’t matter to them and I sometimes view it even the other person don’t care about them that much really. Their hypocrisy tells them to stay out of the picture and reveal themselves at the end of the story then they will take the 🥇 winner side according to what serves their best interests. 

These type of scarifies they give here and there only serves their potential but definitely not me and not necessarily the other party. 

When such thing happens over and over again like none stop pattern with you and with me particularly speaking; it can leave me lost questioning who my people are? And is it possible to lose it all and sometimes even yourself all at once? 

It feels as if your back left full naked in the cold and good luck if you can survive that bitterness or maybe you should expect your downfall at any moment under any cost. 

I am daring to write this not for me only but for every person who have felt or dealt with something similar to the examples I brought, to everyone whose trying to be easy on themselves while taking the time to processing their feelings. 

And I just realized that I have come up with some conclusions drawn in my head, and these are not fake scenarios because after awhile the truth comes out and once you find out about it finally then you will begin to look after yourself and saving what’s left from you for you. 

It is a state of peace of mind that you will keep pushing and working so hard for to gain and it’s the only thing that you won’t regret putting the efforts for. 

You will be helping yourself out by winning yourself back over the nonsense , emptiness and the ridiculous presence of things that can’t fit who you are anymore. 

And for me, this is what and how real growth begins. 
Bedor Alobaidi 

#bedoralobaidi 
Self Portia’s selfi. 
No date is needed.





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